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Sonya Eskridge is a writer from Maryland, who started her news career in radio at the age of After graduating from Virginia Tech, she went on to write for a national publication where she was able to mold her personal voice. Always looking for ways to inform on important issues—or share her love of nerdy and girly things—Sonya thoroughly enjoys writing about a wide range of subjects. HelloGrind Fighting over a man is a losing battle for every woman involved, even the one that eventually gets him. But as much as a I enjoy kicking back to watch all of the fireworks, what really has me clutching my pearls is the amount of fighting between women on the cast over men that refuse to commit.


At AM in the morning, I was awaken by an insistent and nagging sound of a car horn. The first time I ignored it, but after the second and third time of rapid succession of honking I had to get out of my bed. Very loud voices of two women arguing.

I started to feel for the woman who was so angry and heart broken that she felt it necessary to wake up the entire neighborhood in hopes of embarrassing the other woman. The woman, who like her, is sleeping with the same man. Either he was cowering upstairs under the covers or he happened to escape out the back window.

After five minutes of trying to strain my ear, I shook my head and climbed back into bed and fell asleep. Have I ever fussed at another woman about mine or hers man?

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I have however, cussed a man out, threw things, and cried when I found he was being unfaithful. Though I may consider her all kinds of skanks, I have no ill feelings towards her. In the end, you have done nothing but embarrass yourself. Hopefully you will leave him and the relationship with your dignity in tact.

There's no point in fighting over a man who puts you in position where you feel like you need to compete for his love.

If he is capable of sleeping with you and another woman without remorse, let him go. He has opened you up for not only heart break, but the possibility of an unplanned pregnancy or an STD. You deserve better.

You deserve to be with someone who only wants to be with you. The other woman could be hurt also.

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You may feel your pain is worse, but be the generous woman, give up and let her have him. Having two women fight over a man only inflates the ego. While he may become angry, but secretly he is laughing at both of you and is enjoying the show.

A real man would not put the woman he loves in this situation. It gives a mirror image of your self-esteem and lack of self-worth. No woman who is confident and values herself will fight another woman for some man. A woman who has high self-esteem knows her value and knows that she is worthy to be loved by a man who wants only her. No mater how much it hurts, this woman will always walk. She may love him, but she loves herself more.

It makes you look desperate. Why are you fighting a woman over this sorry ass man? Get yourself together and pack your bags or his and keep it moving.

Get out. If so, he would be home with you. I believe and will always believe — once a cheater, always a cheater. This is even more true if he did it before and you forgave him.

The only thing that has happened is that he may have gotten a little more creative with hiding his extracurricular activities. Leave him. Even if he says he will stop, 9 times out of 10, he means he will stop for the moment.

Face behind One Smart Sista, where I discuss the mistakes I've made in love and how you can avoid or at least minimize your own heartache. Notify me of follow-up comments by .

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One man, two women, and a just a bunch of drama.